What Do You See Outside YOUR Open Window Today?

What Do You See Outside YOUR Open Window Today?
Remember: "When God closes a door, He always opens a window!" You never know what might be out there waiting for you!

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Trying to Stay on Track...

I keep coming back to this blank page...and then I get distracted.  There really isn't anything in particular on my mind tonight, but it seems as though I am supposed to be writing something!  So, I sit here and wait on an inspiration to come.  I go back and forth, look at Facebook, look at other things, finish my last library book (why didn't I bring home another???) take a walk, take some pictures...eat a brownie with whipped cream and wish that I didn't...listen to the chatter in the background of my family, the TV, the wind chimes chiming in the back yard as the breeze blows.

Now my almost 92 year old mother in law is asking anyone who is listening if Gene Autrey used to sing a certain song, but what was it? (We need some clues here before we can figure out which song she is thinking about).   And he had a horse named, oh it was a beautiful horse...and Roy Rogers and Dale Evans sang "Back in the Saddle Again" and what was his horse's name? I said "Trigger".  And did we know that Gene Autrey owned the Angels and, so on and so on.  This is the way it goes...conversations go off on different tangents here frequently.  She may start talking about one thing and that leads to another and another and off we go again around the mulberry bush. Such are the ramblings of someone who has mild dementia...(sometimes not as mild as other times) and one can feel like he is watching a ping pong match trying to keep up with the train of thought.

This post is sounding a lot like that. That's what happens after a weekend of trying to keep up with the train and keep it on the track and not allow it to go into dangerous territory...i.e.; some subjects are better left alone. When the "train" starts venturing into that region it is my responsibility to pull it back on the track and keep it going in the right direction...the "safe zones" of pleasant conversation and not areas of anxieties, fears, frustrations, anger and "I want to go back to my own home,"  and "If I still had my car I could still live at home."

Anyone who has been a caregiver for a loved one with dementia or Alzheimer's can relate. Things can go from pleasant to anger in a flash. I have to remember to not try to correct anything that she might say that I know is wrong, because then I am the one who is wrong and judgmental. And don't dare let things get out of order...everything needs to be in the right place at the right time...and meals and pills must stay on schedule.  I tend to do this almost to a fault, because I understand the consequences if I don't keep a tight schedule.  There isn't a lot of room for flexibility in this arena.

We share this responsibility of care with my husband's brother and family.  Thank goodness we are still able to do that, even though it means that we are giving up our weekends...but they have her during the week.

The weekends have turned out to be really nice for my mother in law because she truly enjoys our little Home Bible Fellowship every Sunday morning,
and also looks forward to monthly gatherings with a Ladies' Prayer Group.  These ladies have become special friends to her...and every week she asks me if we are going to see "the ladies" again...especially the one who can play the accordion or the organ and sing.

 Music is the highlight of her life right now.  I understand that is rather typical for elderly people, especially with dementia.  The memory of music seems to be one of the last "senses", if you want to call it that, to go.

There are many golden moments, such as when she started telling the ladies this weekend about the song, "Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, There's just something about that name..." (by Bill and Gloria Gaither) and this gracious group of women just picked right up on that and started singing the song with her.  What a perfect way to start our prayer gathering!  That was totally unplanned...but God knew exactly how to use her "story" to put us in the right frame of mind. It's those kinds of moments that make me pause and smile and say, "That was YOU, Lord, wasn't it? Thank you for living in this precious woman."

My Beautiful 92 yr. old Mother in Law is the lovely lady
 in the center with the white hair!
I am thankful to be a part of her life...(she's been my mother in law for almost 46 years!)...and to help her ease into this last stage of life here on earth as we know it.

"Even to your old age, I am He, and even to gray hairs I will carry you!"  Isaiah 46:4

I sometimes wonder if my own sons will be able to care for me when I reach that stage of life...or if anyone will have the patience to deal with my anxieties and feebleness.  What a comfort it is to know that even to our own old age, God promises to carry us. He knows our needs and will provide whatever we need when the time comes.  I want to be faithful to do my part now for as long as I am able...and trust that when the time comes, God will send the necessary help.

If you are going through similar trials in your family right now, my word of encouragement would be to trust God to see you through. Let Him guide you as you make decisions for your loved one's care, whether it be at home or in a place of professional long term care.  Be sensitive to your family member's needs, but be realistic and reasonable about what you can and cannot do.  We are blessed that our dear one is still physically in pretty good shape, and that we have the support and cooperation of other family members.  It may not always be so.

There are many challenges ahead, but in the meantime we will make the most of the good times and give God praise for her good health, wisdom, and Christian faith. The future rests in God's capable hands. I know He knows what is best for ALL concerned.   And you can rely on that as well in your situation.

Well, I must get to bed. It's been a long weekend, and tomorrow morning I head back to work at my "real job".


"There Is Something About That Name"  by Bill and Gloria Gaither

Jesus. Jesus. Jesus.

There is something about that name.

Master. Savior. Jesus.

Like the Fragrance after the rain.

Jesus. Jesus. Jesus. Let all heaven and earth proclaim.

That kings and kingdoms will pass away.

But there is something about that name.

For some other posts on this subject you might like THIS. (Click Here),  and HERE, and HERE.  


  1. Good post Pamela, you said just what was needed to be said! Your words of encouragement relates to all stages of life. Trusting and depending on Jesus to meet all our needs at any age and in all circumstances! God bless you in your service for him in caring for your Mother-in-law.

    1. Thank you Sylvia. You are right in that we need to learn to trust and depend on Jesus at any age of life. If we could/would all do that, what a wonderful world this would be! Thank you for your words of affirmation. I appreciate having you as a special friend. Blessings to you today.

  2. You are doing a beautiful thing and you are wise enough to capture these good moments to help you through the not-so-good moments. This turned out to be a very lovely and encouraging post. Don't you love when that happens? Almost as if Someone else was involved in the urge to write. Hmmm. :)

    1. Hmmmm exactly! I love it when that "Someone" takes over and makes something good out of my rambling offers. Yes, that WAS God indeed! Thank you for noticing that. I know you often experience the same thing. It's wonderful having THE Author of life as our "co-Author", isn't it?

  3. Hi Pam! Gene's horse was named 'Champion' I believe.
    I have read that the only way to write, is to keep doing it, even when you don't think you have much to say. Just by diving in, you found out you had quite a bit to offer!
    Your women's group is such a blessing to you, and now to your MIL too. How generous they are! And I think it's great that you don't stop meeting, or change the place. You need that touch of 'normal' in your weekend.
    Hope getting back to the 'real job' is going well today :)

    1. You win the prize!!! I wish I had a real prize to give you...I'm sorry I'm not one of those bloggers who gives out gifts...but just be thrilled to know that you know something that I actually had to go online and search for...I admit it. Thank you for your kind words of affirmation. Writing is a partnership with the GREAT AUTHOR above! Without Him, I'd have nothing to say! Have a blessed day my friend.

  4. Pam: When I was in kindergarten, Gene Autry came to our high school gym for an appearance. My uncle, who lived with us, took me to see the show. I barely remember it but there was a story my mother told one of my boyfriends about it.

    1. I can imagine how exciting that must have been for a little girl at the time! He was quite popular when we were kids. I wonder, did he have his horse with him?

  5. What a precious post, Pam. It helps me to know how to better pray for you. Thank you for sharing this portion of your family life. God truly is Encouragement. xo

    1. Thank you for your prayers, Dianna. Yes, we do need them! Everyday seems to bring new challenges and test of patience and faith. But God IS faithful, and He never fails!


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