How Are You Today?

How are you?  I'm fine, thank you. How are you?  I'm okay.

Does this sound familiar? How often do we ask each other these questions back and forth...and do we really listen for the answer?  Or do we just take it for granted that the person says what they mean..."I'm fine, thank you."...but what if they said, "I'm not doing so well. I really need to talk to someone."  Do we stop what we are doing and listen?  Or perhaps they don't come right out and say it that obviously.  Maybe they simply say, "I'm okay", but with a tone that doesn't quite match up to the statement.  Do we prod any further into their private thoughts? Do we ask what's wrong? Do we care?

I am guilty of not taking things a step further.  I often rush on about my business and don't let it sink in that the person may not really be "okay".  This past week everyone was crushed by the tragic suicide of Robin Williams.  Even though I was not a particular fan, I was still saddened by his death. Saddened that the very people who make us laugh are often the ones crying on the inside, and we are not aware. I won't belabor the subject of R.W. any further as much has been said about him all week long in the news, tabloids, everywhere we look.

I will only say that we need to pay closer attention to what people are really saying to us by their

• actions
• words
• expressions
• writings
• non-verbal communications
• attitudes

We have all heard it said:

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."

This has been attributed to Plato, Greek author & philosopher in Athens (427 BC - 347 BC)

Regardless of who said it when, it seems to be a very true statement.  I can speak it from experience. I mean, haven't we all come through some "hard battles" in life? If you've lived a while on this earth, you surely have had some battles.  I remember one young couple in one of our churches in the past who seemed to have everything going well for them.  Good jobs, nice house, great marriage, beautiful children. The wife once made the comment to me that she couldn't understand why everyone wasn't happy like they were. They considered themselves good Christian people, and therefore they seemed to think that they had no problems, no worries and nothing to fear. Her attitude was that if everyone lived life like they did they shouldn't have so many problems.  I tried hard not to be too critical of this naive young woman, and I didn't want to alarm her, but I wanted her to understand that sooner or later everyone goes through some kind of trial on this earth.  If they don't, then possibly they really aren't living a life worth cultivating.  

The New Testament book of I Peter, Chapter 1, addresses this subject. Primarily in verses 6-8, which say:

"In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while,

if need be, you have been grieved by various trials,

that the genuineness of your faith, being much more

precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire,

may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ,

Whom having not seen you love..."

And again we see in the book of James, chapter 1, verses 2-4:

"My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials,

knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.

But let patience have its perfect work,

that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing."

See, sooner or later, if we are living right, we will all suffer through various trials...to help us grow stronger in our faith and maturity.  This young woman that I spoke of earlier soon found out that just living a good life did not guarantee them a worry free existence.  Not long after making this comment to us, their sweet little daughter was diagnosed with autism, and a whole new world of learning and trusting and faith was set before them.  I have not seen or heard of this family in many years since we were called on to other places far away not long after, but I wonder if she would be so glib in her thoughts and comments today.  I have a feeling that their lives were changed over night by this difficult circumstance, but I would be willing to bet they are stronger and richer in faith and love and heart because of the trial that came into their lives.

What I am trying to say is this:  

• Don't be so quick to dismiss someone just because they say they are "Okay".
• Take time to listen to what might be said between the lines
• Don't judge others who may be suffering because they don't live life according to your particular standards.  You really don't know the whole story, do you?
• Don't be so quick to think just because you live right that you won't ever have to endure hardships.
• Trials come to all of us sooner or later.

The good news is this:  We are not alone in our struggles and trials.

Psalm 55:22 says:

"Cast your burden on the Lord,

And He shall sustain you;

He shall never permit the righteous to be moved."

Matthew 11:28-30 says:

"Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden,

and I will give you rest.

Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me,

for I am gentle and lowly in heart,

and you will find rest for your souls.

For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."

Take time to listen to others...and take time to take care of yourself as well.  If you are currently in the midst of a battle, cast your care upon the Lord...He WILL sustain you. He will not forsake you.  Lean on Him and learn what it means to take His yoke upon you and learn from Him.  Then be willing and able to share that knowledge and love with others who may be struggling beneath their heavy load.

Lord, help me to be a load bearer for others who may be struggling beneath their load. Help me not to be so quick to judge.  Help me to remember to lean on You...and lead others to You for strength as well. Amen.