Is It Time To Dance? Updated

This post was originally written on June 28, 2014, just a little over one month after the passing of our dear son Matthew from this life to heaven, following a four year battle with cancer.  When I wrote this I was still  reeling from the pain of saying farewell to our son, and trying to cope with the reality of never seeing him again on this earth.  Now, as of today, 5/25/2022, it has been eight years since that day. A lot has happened in this span of time...we've added new members to our family, and we've said farewell to some other dear ones.  By the time we reach heaven's gates ourselves, I have a feeling there will be more of us waiting there than there are here. It's just the way life is.  Today I haven't really felt like writing...our nation is grieving over the horrific tragic loss of so many precious children and teachers in Uvalde, Texas. My heart is breaking and grieving with those families who have lost their precious children to a crazed madman.  They didn't have the opportunity to say good bye to their child...they had no time to prepare for their unexpected passing from this earth to heaven. Their hearts are broken...for them there is no sense of peace or comfort at this time.  Some may never get to the place where they will feel like it is time to dance ever again. But I pray for them...I pray that God will wrap His loving arms around them and cradle them close to His heart and just hold them, reassuring them of His great love and compassion...and helping them to know that their precious child is safe with Him now...they need not fear for their children anymore...they are where there will be no more crying, no more pain, no more sorrow or fear.  Safe in the arms of Jesus...there can be no better place to be. May God comfort them with those thoughts...and may they be at peace with God, knowing that they will one day be reunited because of their faith in Christ.  That is my prayer for them.  That is what comforts me eight years later. I pray they will also know this great comfort. Amen.

Here is the original post I wrote eight years ago:

"Cause me to hear Your lovingkindness in the morning,

For in You do I trust;

Cause me to know the way in which I should walk,

For I lift up my soul to You."

Psalm 143:8

Today I read in "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young the following passage:

"Rest with Me a while. You have journeyed up a steep, rugged path in recent days.

The way ahead is shrouded in uncertainty.  Look neither behind you nor before you.

Instead, focus your attention on Me, your constant Companion.  Trust that I will equip you fully

for whatever awaits you on your journey."

Actually this particular devotional was written for yesterday's date, but I didn't look at it until today. No matter, it is still appropriate and right on.  Yes, I have journeyed up a "steep, rugged path in recent days." Saying farewell to our precious son until we reunite in heaven still seems unreal. Since his earthly home was over 1500 miles away from us anyway, it is easy to allow myself to think that he's still there waiting for us to come up and visit again.  But then the reality hits, and I remember that he's not there...and it will most likely be a long time before we see him again.

My husband the preacher says that time in heaven is not something they are focused upon like we are here on earth.  That is hard for us to understand because we are so governed by time. We must make every minute count, we can never be late, time is of the essence, hurry up and wait...

King Solomon thought about time quite a bit.  In Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 he wrote:

"To everything there is a season,

A time for every purpose under heaven;

A time to be born,

And a time to die;

A time to plant,

And a time to pluck what is planted;

A time to kill,

And a time to heal;

A time to break down,

And a time to build up;

A time to weep,

And a time to laugh;

A time to mourn,

And a time to dance;

A time to cast away stones,

And a time to gather stones;

A time to embrace,

And a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to gain,

And a time to lose;

A time to keep,

And a time to throw away;

A time to tear,

And a time to sew;

A time to keep silence,

And a time to speak;

A time to love,

And a time to hate;

A time of war,

And a time of peace."

I am still adjusting to this "new time" in my life.  I am not sure what time it is...I believe I am somewhere in the "time to weep and a time to laugh...A time to mourn, and a time to dance".  There are still moments when I feel like weeping and mourning...but there are also times that I want and need to laugh...and I find myself wanting to dance. Not a frenzied kind of dance...not even a waltz...just a holy dance between me and my Lord...where I allow Him to take the lead and twirl me around in His strong and capable arms...lifting me up above my grief and sorrow and showing me the new path that we will travel together. Such a lovely thought.

I am blessed beyond measure...I am not totally bereft of family...I still have my wonderful husband, two healthy and strong sons, a wonderful daughter in law and marvelous grandson...plus many other loved ones near and far.  I do not want to appear to be wallowing in self-pity or lacking in gratitude for all that God has done for me.  But there is this empty place in this mother's heart...a space that will always be missing that one precious son who has gone on to glory much too soon. 

Our precious son, Matthew.

2/25/1973 ~ 5/25/2014

So, what time is it in your  life?  I guess what I am learning is that no matter what season of life we may be in, there is much to learn...and we don't need to feel that we are all alone. God has promised to be with us in our life's journey...from beginning to end.  Perhaps you may discover that it is time for you to let Him take the lead...and just dance. I think I am beginning to understand that better now too.