What Do You See Outside YOUR Open Window Today?

What Do You See Outside YOUR Open Window Today?
Remember: "When God closes a door, He always opens a window!" You never know what might be out there waiting for you!

Saturday, December 19, 2020

When Things Start to Fall Apart...Just Get Back Up and Shine!! Repeat Performance...

Original post written a few years ago...but it seems like I relive this "repeat performance" every year about this time...How about you? Is the pre-Christmas stress starting to get to you? Are things feeling more like they are falling apart than put together?...Read on and maybe we can get through this season together...

12/20/2017:
This morning was the day for our home Bible Study, and we have been lighting the candles on the Advent Wreath each week.  Because our wreath is made of real pine boughs attached to wet florist's blocks, I keep it outside on the back porch during the week in between our gatherings so it won't dry out so much in the warm, dry house.

This morning after replacing some of the pine boughs that were starting to die with fresh ones, I brought the wreath into the house to get it ready for our service.  As soon as I set it down around the candles on the little table in our living room, it literally fell apart...some of the foam blocks fell to the floor, with the pine needles falling all over the place...and it was a MESS!!  I quickly gathered the pieces back up and stuck them all back together as good as I could since I didn't have time to start over.

So here is the poor lopsided Advent Wreath, looking rather disheveled and worn...Kind of the way I feel about this time every year as we get closer to Christmas and I am not really ready...

I woke up this morning and said out loud (while still lying upon my bed) "I hate myself!"  My husband was just barely awake and didn't quite understand what I said, so he asked me to repeat it. So I did...and he was quite perplexed, surprised and concerned. This is not a normal state of affairs for me, especially to say out loud before I even get out of bed! Actually, I don't think I've ever said that in my head or out loud.  That's just not me.  But I went to sleep last night thinking about all the things that I still need to do in the next few days before Christmas (too numerous to list here and I don't want you to know exactly how much I still need to do...)...and I woke up thinking about all these things and I just said out loud "I hate myself!"  Why? Because I do this every single year!  You would think I would have learned by now not to put off so much until the last week before Christmas and then end up in a panic having a meltdown in the middle of a department store because I can't find what I want and I don't even know what I want even if I could find it and when I do find it I know I really don't want that after all, but in desperation I have to get something!!!  And just like that Advent Wreath, I fall apart and look disheveled and worn and just wish I could crawl away somewhere and hide until Christmas is all over.

I wonder how Mary, the mother of Jesus, felt the week before Christmas.

There she was, technically a betrothed but still unmarried young woman, great with child...(not by her betrothed husband to be, but by the Holy Spirit, so you can imagine how difficult that had been to explain to everyone...) and wouldn't you know it was time to travel to Bethlehem to be counted in the census?  I'm not sure just how long that trip was, but you can only imagine, even five miles would be too far to travel on the back of a donkey when you are nine months pregnant.  And then, to finally arrive in Bethlehem only to discover that all the hotel rooms were taken, and there was no room for them in the Inn, so the only place they could stay was in a smelly, dirty animal stable, with the dirty, smelly animals standing by. Can you imagine how Mary must have felt?  Talk about being rather disheveled and worn and weary...and then to go into labor and actually give birth to your baby right there in that stable with the animals watching?  And there were no midwives or doctors or nurses available to help with the labor and delivery...no medicine to block the pain...no clean bed to lay upon...and only your betrothed there to attend to you...a man whom who truly have not known in that kind of intimate way...

Can you imagine how Mary must have felt...she had no clean, soft blanket or diapers to comfort her newborn babe?  But somehow she found some "swaddling cloths" to wrap around him, and she laid him in the hay in the manger.

If I had been Mary, I wonder if I could have been so cool, calm, and collected at the birth of my first child? Probably not, judging by the way I've been acting this week before Christmas...

But perhaps if the angels had come to tell me about the birth of my baby in the first place...and then if the angels had come to sing praises at His birth...and the shepherds had come to bow down and worship Him
...maybe I would have a different attitude...perhaps I wouldn't be so focused on the peripheral "stuff", but would be truly worshiping and adoring the Child sent to me by God...God's Gift to me...and to the whole world...and I would be singing with the angelic choir..."Gloria in excelsis Deo"...Glory to God in the Highest...and Peace, Goodwill to men...



So, after thinking about this, maybe I just need to pull myself together, get my self organized, and just get out there and "shine"...

Like this Advent Wreath, after  straightening up the candles, pulling the pine boughs back together as well as possible, we read the verses about the Angels announcing Jesus' birth to Mary, Joseph, and the Shepherds...and then we lit the candles and let it shine forth in the darkness.

Yes, that's what I need to do. There isn't much time left...but after giving myself this little "pep talk", I think I can go out with a new and brighter attitude...and a song of joy in my heart as I go about my activities of preparation for the celebration of the birth of Jesus, our Savior and Lord!!!

"Hark the Herald Angels sing, Glory to the Newborn King!"

16 comments:

  1. “So here is the poor lopsided Advent Wreath...”

    This is a wonderful image of something that just needs a little love. :)

    I visibly sank with your hate statement. Hug. I think...that The Lord felt that with a crushing blow and wants you to know He loves you.

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    1. Thank you Sandi. I probably shouldn't have repeated it, because I really don't HATE myself...maybe I am just disappointed in myself because I can't seem to learn. Thank you for reminding me that Jesus loves me just as I am...and He understands me. I just wish He'd help me do things differently next time! Maybe He's been trying to do just that...and maybe that is what this is all about. Thank you for caring.

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  2. I think we all have felt that at some point/some time in our lives. I used to over commit all the time because I didn't want to let anyone down and then I would end up paying the piper by being on edge trying to get everything done. I know you spoke out of frustration and that tomorrow will be a better day. God bless you---xo Diana

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    1. Thank you SO much, Diana. I have awakened to a new dawn, a new day, a fresh start. Today I will accomplish exactly what God intends for me to accomplish...and that will be "enough"!! Because with Jesus on my side, everything is exactly "enough"!!

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  3. Oh Pam, we have all been there! I had this week all planned out and it got all switched around yesterday and made my Thursday list need to be done on Wednesday. But you know what, those few things I didn't get done, will get done and my sister will be here to help! What made me think I needed to get it all done before they arrived? We get pushed back a bit and regroup and forge ahead again - and hopefully make a little progress! It is what it is...a good mantra! I love how you talked (wrote) yourself out of hating yourself!! You have had a crazy busy few weeks and came through them just fine. You are AMAZING!! Love & hugs!!

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    1. Oh, Thank you, Terri. I am so glad you understand. Even when we are retired things don't just magically get done on time and perfectly. We still have things get rearranged for us like you did...out of our hands...but God is still in control, and I have to remember that...no matter what!! I hope you have a wonderful time with your sister!!!

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  4. Today, I had a day of 'I hate myself' too. A terrible day that affected my husband adversely also. Thank you for reminding me that I'm just a human that can only do so much ... and Jesus still loves me. I hope you get everything on your list done this week. You are an inspiration to me in every post. Have a merry and blessed Christmas!

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    1. I am sorry that you had a bad day as well. Something in the air...but YES! Jesus still loves us in our humanness...that is why He came in the first place...because He loves us so much! Thank you for your kind words. I pray that you will have a very Merry Christmas as well...you AND your hubby.

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  5. Thank you, Pamela, for this pep talk, I think we all needed it. I know I did!
    Great and touching post, lots to think about!
    Merry Chistmas!

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  6. Pam: Don't feel alone in your doldrums. I had so wanted to have more done that I have accomplished. As I write this, I have some gastric distress going on. I did finish my shopping early this afternoon. I intend to get the things done I NEED to. I believe we all get to the place we feel what you said,especially this time of year.

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  7. Pam, you aren't alone in how you feel about yourself. However, I do believe that God wants us to see ourselves as He does. Seeing ourselves as God does makes a huge difference. Yes, it's disappointing to continue a certain behavior each year (just thinking about Christmas), however, God still loves us no matter what.

    Your Advent wreath may look a little scraggly but it has charm. Think about Charlie Brown's Christmas Tree. :)

    Merry Christmas!!

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  8. I feel your pain, Pamela, but pray you will get all done that has to get done before Christmas Day. I believe God will put you back together just as perfectly as you did your Advent wreath!
    Love and blessings, and a Merry Christmas!

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  9. Pam, your meltdown worked a beautiful thing in you to share with us. I'm so sorry you said that to yourself, but I have been guilty as well. We have such high expectations of ourself at Christmas time. Why? Why must everything be perfect? You've shown us yourself here how God brought Jesus into the world in the midst of hard things for Mary and Joseph. I love this post. I hope you are better now and get everything done.

    I have also been thinking about Mary this week. And I also was reading the passage where Jesus said our idle words are remembered. I looked it up and saw that also means useless words and I have been thinking about the words I speak whether they are useful or useless. Don't say you hate yourself. Jesus loves you, even when you're down and out.

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  10. Oh dear, so sorry I missed this when you posted. I am way to familiar with that feeling unfortunately. When you say something like that and you know it is not true and not really you, I am sure you know it's our enemy huh? He hits us when we are down, tired, overwhelmed and it is so easy to believe the lies.
    Praying for you this season my friend. I love you.

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  11. Thank you for sharing this. Somehow, because there won’t be anyone else showing up for Christmas, I almost wish I had a ton of things to do.now, isn’t that we usually are, always wishing for what we don't have? My son and granddaughter and i are celebrating our Christmas tomorrow, so Christmas day will be eve quieter.

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    1. Oh Ruth, I know, this year everything is so different for everyone. We will still have our kids here on Christmas day, but the rest of the family is up in the air...I don't know if or when we will even try to get together. But I am thankful that our kids are close and we are blessed to have them when so many don't. I pray your time with your son and granddaughter will be really sweet tomorrow. Enjoy every moment...take some pictures. How old is your granddaughter? I know she will enjoy just being with you and you will make some sweet memories together. I pray that your Christmas day may have some pleasant surprises for you. God bless you dear friend. Oh, and I loved seeing those pictures of your husband's train. That was really really special. (((hugs)))

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