weekends (Friday-Monday morning) for over three years, and off and on before that. My husband's brother and family have had her the other part of the week. So our lives have pretty much been determined by when "Nanny" is here or when she is not.
She is a big part of the reason that we started having a home Bible study in our home on Sundays instead of attending a regular church.
That, in itself, was a big adjustment to our lives, but God has blessed that special time with good friends, fellowship, and much growth in Christ together. We are still meeting this way, just a small group, but we believe this is the way the Lord would have us continue for now.
So, the last few days I have been little by little returning things back to a "pre-Nanny" state in our house...little things like cleaning her room and washing the bed linens, putting away her special cups that she used...odds and ends that we have used to accommodate her particular needs...and I find myself missing her smiles and the funny things she'd say...sometimes not making a whole lot of sense to everyone else, but important to her...
Yes, it is a lot like grieving...even though she is still very much alive...she is most likely never coming back to our house...and after being my mother in law for over 47 years, I find that very sad. Since my own mother passed away about 11 years ago, "Nanny" has been a mother to me in many ways. She has been a wonderful grandmother to our sons and has always been a big part of their lives...so they are missing her as well. My hubby has very mixed emotions right now...feelings of guilt, sorrow, and perhaps even some anxiety over the whole situation. That, plus the fact that she is now over 2 hours drive away from us adds another level of frustration as we deal with how often can we or should we go to visit her...and how long is long enough to stay when we do...it's not an easy situation for us. In some ways it is easier to have her here than it is to travel to see her when she doesn't really seem to understand where she is or why she is there and she just "wants to go home".
So, I appreciate your thoughts and prayers as we go through this time of transition with her. I know many of you have already been there with your loved ones...some may even be going through this now at the same time...and you can totally empathize with my concerns and feelings.