Saturday, March 23, 1991, 10:26 p.m.:
"Kind of late already! Just wanted to record some milestones from today...
- I mailed a story to "Country Living" magazine today ~ "The Old Whelchel Estate", submitted to the "Reader's Corner". I pray they will accept the story for print in the magazine. But even if they don't, I enjoyed writing it~it was a step of faith for me to actually send it~kind of like a fleece to see if the Lord will encourage me to write. Although this wasn't much of an inspirational writing...but it was something from my heart~a starting place to help me get going in all the writing I long to do.
- Today we submitted our resume's to _____college. We mailed them to ____(the President of the College). This again was a BIG STEP OF FAITH. We've been rejected so many times before. And really things are going pretty well here now~God is blessing our church and ministry so much, so we aren't trying to escape a bad situation. We have good jobs. I have a job where I can do all the things I love to do. My husband has some positions in the district (denominational), and we recently got a wonderful pay-raise, etc. So no, it's not an escape~but it's the long standing desire to go back to ____ and teach that keeps driving us onward. It's been the reason behind all of the further education over the years. We believe now is the time~if ever there will be a time. Next fall we will have two sons attending college full time there."
"And Lord, we commit our future into your hands. We don't want to ever step out of your will~for anything~no matter how long we've desired it. So, please Lord, hear our prayer...and know our hearts. We want to do what is pleasing and acceptable in Your sight."
A couple of weeks later I wrote again in my journal:
"I received a letter back from "Country Living" magazine today. They couldn't use my story. I guess I figured that. I believe God wants me to use my talent solely for His honor and glory~and not my own. So, in His time~I hope to do just that."
And no, we did not get the position we hoped for at the college. For some reason known only to God, that dream was never fulfilled. We knocked on that door so many times that I am certain there are knuckle dents on the door...but God never allowed the "Closed Door" to be opened to us. God had other plans for our lives...other places and people (and "Open Windows") that He needed us to minister to. This is probably one of those questions I would like to ask God about someday when I get to heaven...but it won't be necessary...because on that day I will understand with the mind of Christ. He will show me the "bigger picture" that I can't see now, and it will all make sense at that time. Until then, I will keep trusting and following my Savior in whatever way He leads. He has never led us astray...He just hasn't taken us exactly where we hoped to go. But that's His business, not mine.
And the writing...well this is it. May God be honored and glorified today. Amen.